You Know When .......

YOU KNOW YOU’RE A RANCHER'S WIFE WHEN:

1. When your Family Home Evening is a trip to the stockyards;

2. When your family vacation is a trip to the county fair!

3. When you use the car wash as a cow wash (to "clean 'em up, ready to win de prize")

4. When you have a bear in your bedroom and a moose on your wall;

5. When your trophy room doubles as a bedroom;

6. When your front room is nicknamed the "Dead-Head" room;

7. When the hamburger in the freezer is from the cow who crushed you into the fence;

8. When your better-half puts a calf in the bathtub;

9. When he uses your blow dryer to dry it off;

10. When your "mud room" is really filled with mud, and sometimes blood;

11. When you've pulled more calves than weeds;

12. When the beef in the freezer is the "cow from the wash";

13.When you are pulled over by a cop for transporting "the cow from the wash" in the back-hoe bucket;

14. When your kindergarten child explains preg testing in sharing time;

15. When your grandson thinks cows "poop out" their calves;

16. When hunting comes before your birthday;

17. When the horse your hubby rides was your birthday present;

18. When you use your car to herd the cows and a cow dents the fender;

19. When you hope the next wreck you're, in dents the same fender;

20. When you are the cook for the hay crew;

21. When you are the hay crew;

22. When you holler for the kids, but the dogs come;

23. When the consequence for misbehavior is shoveling manure;

24. When you spend more hours in the day on the way to and from the bus stop than the kids spend watching TV;

25. When you only get to watch TV to get the weather - on all stations and at all times of the day;

26. When you can pack for a week-long pack trip in 30 minutes;

27. When you know what a pack trip is;

28. When your only recipe book is for a Dutch oven;

29. When your only pans are Dutch ovens;

30. When you hubby's lost in the woods and 17 horse trailers pulled by Power Stroke Diesels show up before search and rescue.

31. When you take your hubby's Power Stroke to town and get an arm cramp from waving;

32. When you open the washer and it's full of newly washed calf ears;

33. When "Show and Tell" is not a pretty rock but bull horns;

34. When the biggest junk collectors are ranchers and teachers and he is both;

35. When you get a flat from an empty hypodermic needle;

36. When your hubby gets a bull bag for Christmas and his next present is "utterly" ridiculous;

37. When he "Displays" the bull bag on the front room coffee table as the centerpiece;

38. When your daughters wedding breakfast is held at the Big Z;

39. When your Lamaze partner is your Mother-in-law;

40. When your greatest shopping pleasure changes from Nordstrom’s to Smith and Edwards;

41. When you order dessert at the Big Z!!!

42. When you know what the "Big Z" is! (it happens to be a diner close to the livestock auction)

43. When you move bales before breakfast;

44. When your tractor is the only vehicle with air conditioning and full surround sound stereo with a remote;

45. When you do the dishes while the rest of the hay crew sleeps on the floor.

46. When there are more grandkids in the hay crew than adults!

(During the year that Paige was born, one of the popular things on the radio was Jeff Foxworthy’s “You Know You’re a Redneck when…” While waiting in the doctor’s office and eating, Debbie and Mom made up this list:)

Miles and the State Champs

For the last several years we have went to Denver Colorado for wrestling tournaments. Some years three different times. One year it was Miles, Jeremy, Grandpa and Myself. The interesting thing was that Miles was the only one who could wrestle. So he had three coaches. Some people in the motel asked to borrow our scales and while the kid was weighing the Dad asked if both of the boys were in the tournament and we said "oh no just the little one". Then the man said "boy he must be really tough if this one boy has three coaches".

Well this year we went to Denver with Miles and found a herd of state champions in his weight (171). Normally you will see 4 or 5 state champions with maybe 1 that is a two time or a three timer but that was not the case this year. This year there were 9 state champions out of 36 in the weight. It seemed like a lot but as people kept talking and other dads were researching we were told that of the 9 Miles was the only one time state champion. There were 2 timers that were juniors and seniors. There were 3 timers that were juniors and seniors and there was one 4 time state champion out of South Dakota. Coaches from Wyoming would ask me what Miles was seated in the tournament and Iwould say "nothing?" then they would come back and tell me that what a tough weigh he was in.

Miles first match was pretty simple. It was the only match that he wrestled on Friday. The kid was not a state champion and he didn't last very long. Saturday was the big day. He started by wrestling a 2 time state champion out of New Mexico. The kid was a senior and had only been beaten twice this year. See the picture above. Then he wrestled a 4 time champion out of South Dakota. Now let me explain the way the big tournaments works. They have the bracket at one table or mat and you wrestle on that mat the entire tournament. No names are called by the announcer the whole tournament runs on a numbering system. By looking at your bracket you find your match number then show up when it is your turn to wrestle. Since there is no announcer screeming out names all day long they play music instead. Miles loves music. He gets this little dancey bounce going and he is laughing and joking around with the people around him and this gets him going. The happier he is at the edge of the mat the meaner he is on the mat.

So, back to his two matches. with the 2 timer out of New Mexico they were both even with each other on their feet. In the second period though Miles caught him in a cradle and scored two points that was the difference in the match. Miles ended up wrestling this kid again and lost because the kid caught him with a little trick and scored two points. They were both very even.

The South Dakota kid was the 4 timer and a senior. This kid however had been beaten several times throughout the year. After the match (where Miles pinned the kid) Miles was talking to him and he asked Miles if he tried to stay in shape and Miles said "well sort of" then the kid asked him if he drank beer and Miles said "no" then the kid said "Oh that is the difference". It was very funny.

Miles ended up fifth at the tournament. He beat 2 time, 3 time and 4 time state champions. He was beaten by the kid who won the tournament from Montana a state champion last year at 171 and this year at 189. He was very strong. In wyoming Miles lookes like a big 171 lb wrestler but in Denver he was little.

Here is a video of his best match. He wrestled on a raised platform and it was all very exciting.

You can see some of his matches on YouTube at: http://www.youtube.com/user/mbartnixon